Ivy (Psychological Counselor, currently living in Germany) shared: "In the past, in feudal society, women were often constrained by strict rules and etiquette. They were taught to 'follow the three obediences and four virtues', 'housekeeping', depend on men and have no voice in society. However, there are still strong women who dare to overcome barriers, assert themselves and become shining examples for the next generation."
When talking about "strong women" and "femininity", three pictures of three generations of women in the family immediately appear in Ivy's mind.
Ivy - Coach, currently living in Germany.
The hard-working image of grandmother and mother
Life Coach Ivy's grandmother and mother represent the previous generation of women, a typical image of traditional Vietnamese women: hard-working, gentle and always silently sacrificing for the family.
"My grandmother is the one who takes care of everything from cooking, washing, cleaning the house to taking care of the children. She devoted her entire youth to taking care of the family. However, whenever there is a big or small matter in the house, the role of the man - my grandfather - is always remembered and given more priority," said Ivy.
He had the opportunity to travel here and there with his children and grandchildren, and had business trips far away, both Western and Eastern. As for his grandmother, the longest trip of her life was probably the trip with her grandfather back to the countryside. When mentioning that, Ivy couldn't help but feel sad.
Ivy and her mother - the great woman in her life whom she always admired.
Like her grandmother, her mother was always a strong support for Ivy's father, a wonderful woman whom she always respected. Her mother had a dream of becoming a doctor, but could not achieve it because in those days, women were rarely given the opportunity to go to school.
The lives of women in the time of my grandmother and mother were tied to housework and the worries of making a living. They did not have as many opportunities to study and develop themselves as modern women. Their joy was simply seeing their family happy, their children healthy and their husbands successful.
Having accompanied and gone through all those great sacrifices, Ivy always felt gratitude and admiration. She confided: "To me, the image of my grandmother and mother or of millions of women at that time is a beautiful traditional cultural feature of Vietnam. They are the women who 'keep the fire' for the home, are the spiritual support for their husbands and children. Thanks to their silent sacrifices, the family has warmth, happiness and children are raised in loving arms."
Feminism and the desire for freedom of 7x 8x women
By Ivy's aunt's generation, the way of thinking about women had changed a lot. They were active, strong, daring women who were aware of their own value.
"My aunts always believe that 'money is power'. They work harder to assert their abilities and position in the family," Ivy shared. "They also want to prove that women are just as powerful and can do everything as men."
According to Ivy, the 7x 8x generation of women are dynamic, strong, dare to think, dare to do and are aware of their own value.
Unlike their grandmothers and mothers, women of the aunts' generation are not afraid to venture into fields that were considered "exclusive" to men. They participate in economic and social activities, expressing their voices and roles in the community. It can be said that women of the aunts' generation are pioneers in the fight for women's rights. They want to be equal with men in all areas of social life.
New generation women: Femininity and courage go hand in hand
As millennials, Ivy and her peers are more open-minded and modern. They do not place too much emphasis on "feminism" but aim for a balance between femininity and bravery.
New age women have more open and modern thinking.
"I am not someone who wants to take away the role of others. Everyone has their own position and job. What is important is that we know how to appreciate our own value, that of our companions, and confidently pursue our dreams. My luck is probably freedom. Thanks to that freedom, I am independent in my thinking and life, a bit bold but always know how to take responsibility for my life," Ivy expressed.
Freedom, courage and responsibility allow Ivy to do everything she dreams of.
Talking to Ivy, everyone will feel a fresh, abundant source of energy. An independent girl, but still very feminine and delicate. For Ivy, femininity does not mean weakness. It is a soft, skillful energy that helps women shine in their own way. Perhaps because of that, she does not hesitate to show "herself" to anyone.
"Sometimes I see myself as water. Water is very flexible, no matter what form you put it in, it will form, into a flower it will become a flower, into a sword it will become a sword, water is very flexible. And for me, femininity is the same, flexible and changeable like water. It can be gentle, calm, and peaceful for us to reflect on, but it can also be fierce and strong. The important thing is that we know how to use this energy to create value for ourselves and for life," she compared.
Women should be a source of cool, peaceful energy for themselves and for those around them.
There is a saying that she really likes and considers as a guideline in her relationships: Soft rope binds tight. She said: "Whenever I encounter something too difficult, I often think of this saying. Relax yourself, be gentle, and everything will pass." Besides femininity, to Ivy, modern women also need to equip themselves with courage to confidently assert themselves in society.
She said: "Working with many young women, I realize that women today are very different from the old society. They are more confident, independent and dare to think and do. There are also groups of people who cannot fully express themselves, cannot make their own decisions or are easily influenced by those around them; or there are also women who overemphasize 'feminism', as if they put themselves in a box and then scream to escape. Society is now more open and modern, so women should just show their true role, be feminine but not weak, brave but not domineering, most importantly, understand yourself. Shine in your own way and bring good values to life."
Girls, shine in your own way and bring good values to life.
