Why is it that the older we get, the harder it is to accept new things?

Because the mind always wants to protect us from unfamiliar things, when we try new things, the psychological resistance becomes stronger. The mental resistance says: “This is new, I don't trust it."

That is why the older people get, the more conservative they tend to be and the harder it is to accept new things. As well as the way of thinking, the habits that are ingrained, people do not want to change or accept new knowledge.

Why is openness necessary in this day and age?

The recent Covid-19 pandemic has emphasized that nothing is stable; it changes the way of life, the way of communication and many human behaviors. Many jobs gradually disappear and some jobs develop strongly, especially e-commerce. In addition, occupations that our previous generation did not know such as: Influencer, SEO specialist, Facebook Ads, Youtuber, Life Coach, Online business, technology motorbike taxi, online newspaper/magazine... have increased significantly.

Science and technology are constantly developing, machines are gradually replacing humans in agriculture/industrial production. Recently, MBN - Korea surprised everyone when it broadcast the first program with AI (artificial intelligence) as the MC; even Vietnamese universities have majors in Artificial Intelligence. But that does not mean humans will be "unemployed", machines have higher intelligence than humans, but they still do not have (at least at the present time) something that humans are very proficient at, which is consciousness.

Open from the smallest things

Even though there are things that are ingrained in the subconscious, it is not impossible to change. In the bookThe power of habit- Author Charles Duhigg said: "Champions do not do extraordinary things. They do ordinary things, but instinctively, quickly enough that their opponents cannot react. That is because they follow habits they have learned."

Our habits are what we become. So start changing yourself with small habits and you will see the magical results.

adaptability: An innate human ability

Because the brain always resists new things, habits are therefore difficult to change.

According to an article byScienceDaily, when you repeat a task, the brain will form Myelin - a substance that covers the nerves and has the ability to increase the strength, speed and accuracy of that task. The more you repeat an activity, behavior or job, the more Myelin rings are formed around neurons that take on different roles. When you continuously practice communicating in English, the nerves will be covered with a lot of Myelin, helping you become fluent and no longer waste time looking for grammar or conjugating verbs.

The psychology of resisting new things is also partly due to Myelin, because Myelin creation only happens one way; so the habits, ways of thinking, and behaviors that we have considered "home" will be difficult to break. To change a habit, we cannot destroy it, we can only transform it. The only way is to form new Myelin layers around new neurons by repeating a new behavior. Like smoking addiction, addicts find it difficult to quit completely in the first days, they transform it by the habit of chewing gum or even another stimulant like vape or coffee... Or when pronouncing English incorrectly for a long time, learners must be aware of their mistakes and start practicing the new habit at a certain frequency.

“People who excel in all fields, from singers, players, athletes, scholars, to skilled workers, all have on average higher amounts of myelin in the brain hemispheres and appropriate muscle groups than normal people who do not work in that field” (Famous Talent Code, Daniel Coyle).

We can see that creating Myelin through perseverance and mastering a positive habit helps us achieve success in life. Because the Myelin formation stage will show signs of slowing down at the age of 50, so if we still maintain a boring, toxic habit or produce Myelin for something worthless; we will waste our youth meaninglessly.

It's not because I'm smart, it's because I stick with difficult problems longer.

Albert Einstein

A study has found that although the left parietal lobule of Einstein's brain has an average number of neurons, it compensates with an extremely high number of glial cells that produce Myelin. Perhaps everyone has their own innate abilities, but the skills we lack can become proficient and talented based on our own will, determination and perseverance.

4 stages to learning anything

Starting a new habit can also be applied to the learning model that was established and developed in the 70s (by Martin M. Broadwell - Management Trainer and Gordon Training International). Below are the 4 stages to learning anything, according toMindtools.

unconscious incompetence

This stage is when we don’t have the ability or knowledge about a thing. We are not even aware that this knowledge and skills can benefit us later.

For example, a child does not realize the convenience of riding a two-wheeler, or retailers do not realize the potential of e-commerce before Covid-19 hits.

We always don’t know what we don’t know. But people tend to resist understanding new things. Every individual needs to recognize their own inadequacies and find the reason and value of new skills before they can move to the next stage. The length of time a person stays in stage 1 is inversely proportional to their openness, curiosity and motivation to learn.

conscious incompetence

The stage of pain and self-esteem. In the second stage, we realize the reason for learning a new skill as well as its value to our own shortcomings. People only really want to learn when they see the benefits of learning them. But in this stage; our inadequacies and mistakes will be most clearly shown, making us feel that we are not good enough and easily give up.

For example, when learning to ride a motorbike, we fall many times. Or interns also have to make mistakes to learn company culture.

In fact, mistakes are essential, because it is through them that we know what we need to learn, to adjust and change ourselves. This life is like riding a bicycle, to move forward we must keep moving.

conscious competence

The stage when we have understood and performed a skill or a problem; but still need a certain concentration to be able to perform well. In the West, there is a saying "practice makes perfect", we need to practice a lot at this stage so that the knowledge becomes fluent and goes deep into the mind. Practicing a lot helps create Myelin layers for neurons.

For example, when first communicating in English, many people often stutter because the brain needs to load a large amount of knowledge such as: tense division, grammar, vocabulary, pronunciation, intonation, reflexes with others... When we have communicated enough, we will speak fluently and react faster without thinking.

In stage 3, people lose a lot of energy because they must always have conscious participation to perform the new skill; for example, they must always be aware of mistakes.

Unconscious competence

To achieve stage 4, an individual must practice the skill a lot, which in psychology is called going deep into the subconscious. When the neurons have been covered with enough Myelin and help the brain to be sensitive in absorbing and developing different skills from the mastered skills, it becomes second nature, we will do it easily and can do another skill at the same time.

For example, riding a motorbike while talking on the phone.

We know it so well and are so familiar with it that we are not even aware that we are doing it. This leads to a conflict between the two unconscious states (stages 1 and 4). A person at stage 4 sees the activity as a natural habit and is not consciously aware of how to do it; a person at stage 1 is not yet conscious of how to do it. Compare the parents who ask how to use their phones to the digital generation who are so adept at using it that they are unconsciously tapping on their phones as they walk. Because of the same unconscious states, there is often a conflict. So the key is to be open; we do not have the same experiences as them and they do not know everything we have experienced.

"Prajna"

In Buddhism there is a concept: Prajna.

Prajna is a transliterated noun meaning: Wisdom, Wisdom, Awareness. It means wisdom but not the wisdom of reasoning or logical knowledge, but the wisdom of understanding thoroughly, without contradiction. In other words, each of us has awareness - wisdom. Knowledge is just the items that we will collect on the path of life. Wisdom is understanding, openness, intelligence, clarity, high awareness. So be aware that the ocean of knowledge out there is endless, open your heart and you will see many profound things.

Vo Khanh Duy