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Maasai women and children - Photo: Le Tri
He got many wives because he had many cows.
During our exploration of Kenya's largest nature reserve, Masai Mara, almost all the men we met, from drivers to service staff, had two or more wives, many of them in their twenties.
These men all belong to the Maasai tribe, and although they have left the wilderness, they still maintain the age-old tradition of their ancestors that one must have many wives and many children to be considered a descendant of the Maasai tribe.
They might work as far away as Nairobi or at the upscale Mara Simba Lodge in the Masai Mara nature reserve, then return to their villages to marry and have children as a source of pride for their tribe. However, to be able to marry multiple wives, Edward, an employee at Mara Simba Lodge, said that when he was preparing to marry his first wife, he had 10 cows and used 5 as a dowry for her family. He continued to care for the remaining 5 until the herd grew to 15, then used another 5 large cows as a dowry for his second wife. Currently, he has two wives.He is raising 10 animals.He had the remaining cows, and he planned that when the herd grew to 20 cows, he would take a third wife.
But not everyone has it easy to have multiple wives, as exemplified by Daniel, our tour driver. He's turning 30 this year but already has two wives and five children. He recounted that when he fell in love with his second wife, he didn't have enough cows for the wedding ceremony, but he didn't want to wait. So he committed a daring act: he took her and eloped to another village.
The girl's familyEnraged, they brought the village chief to his parents' house to demand the return of their daughter. Knowing their son's "plight," his parents shook their heads, pretending not to know anything. Two months later, when he and his wife returned to the village, everything was already over. It wasn't until their child was one year old that he had enough cows to give as a dowry to his wife's family.
At this point, he couldn't hide his pride in his "achievement" and told us that he would strive to marry four wives, because his father, who is over 50 years old this year, has three wives and sixteen children, and he wants to surpass his father by one wife, because... "a son surpassing his father brings blessings to the family" (!?).
GenderThe young people want to change the practice of polygamy.
Polygamy among men is not uncommon in the Maasai tribe, as in many other parts of Africa, but not all members of this tribe or Kenyan men are fond of it.
Naisola, currently the head receptionist at Mara Simba Lodge and also a member of the Maasai tribe, said that the three girls escaped the wild life of the Maasai in the Narok region, received a proper education, and married only their mother.
Naisola himself graduated from college in Nairobi and is fluent in three languages: English, French, and Swahili. According to Naisola, he is an educated person.It's difficult for her to accept her husband having multiple wives. That's why, even though Naisola is 30 years old, she is still unmarried.
In addition, there are Kenyan men from other tribes, or those who are religious (62% of Kenya's population is Catholic), who also do not take multiple wives. Ongoto, 21, a student at Nairobi Hotel and Restaurant College, from the Kish tribe, a Protestant, and currently an intern at Mara Simba Lodge, affirms that he will only marry one wife.
According to Naisola and Ongoto, Kenya is still poor, so limiting polygamy and large families is essential for the country's development. In the eyes of these two young people as they spoke with us, there shone a desire to change customs so that no more children would be born into hardship like those in Kasoe village, not far from where they work.
The issues of poverty and population are unresolved problems not only for Kenya but for the entire African continent.
The Maasai men's "performance" is also quite intriguing. Vietnamese men always boast about their conquests, but only God knows the reality. Maasai men are very practical, so when we jokingly asked Edward about his "performance," he laughed heartily: "It's a small matter, just take turns with each wife."
He also mentioned that Maasai men are very strong partly because they regularly drink cow's blood mixed with milk. Even so, sometimes they can't "complete the task" because, like Edward, he only visits home once a month, and both his wives want to be intimate first. So he has to "beg" each wife to stop being so sulky and they'll figure things out later.
